


Black Shroud

by zwischenimmerundnie



Series: The Only Thing [5]
Category: Call Me By Your Name (2017) RPF
Genre: Angst, Long-Distance Relationship, M/M, Slow Burn, Texting, Years apart, they were ON a BREAK
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-02
Updated: 2018-04-02
Packaged: 2019-04-17 12:48:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,954
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14189286
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zwischenimmerundnie/pseuds/zwischenimmerundnie
Summary: Armie had been through a lot of things in his life, but none of them seemed to have prepared him for the dreadful days that followed his conversation with Timothée. He was in pain, heartbroken and confused; his head still trying to wrap around the idea of not having Timothée anymore. How long would it take for the brunette to make up his mind? Did they still have a chance to make things work?





	Black Shroud

 

Armie liked to run.

For years now he resorted to running whenever he needed to clear his head; the cool breeze on his face, the rhythmical pace, the heavy breathing, the sweat, it all took his focus from whatever was troubling him and brought him to a place of tranquility and peace. For two weeks now he had run every single morning and a few nights, trying to keep the thought of Timothée away; it didn´t always work, but Armie still liked to try, if anything went south, at least his body was left intact.

The two weeks that followed their conversation had been of complete radio silence; well to be fair Timothée did read the occasional messages Armie left him and the older man had already noticed the brunette lurking through social media. Armie had never been so happy to see someone liking his posts as he did when he would see Timothée´s name under a photo or a tweet; the brunette had yet to talk to him, though.

No actual word was shared between them on those two weeks and Armie, who although hurt had tried to maintain a positive attitude towards the whole situation, was starting to lose hope on their relationship. There was absolutely nothing in life he wanted more than to try and make it work with Timothée, but it seemed like they simply weren´t meant to be together.

He checked his phone the second he arrived home. No messages, no voice mails, no calls; another day had gone by without him hearing from Timothée. Armie wanted to call, he wanted to take a stand and tell the brunette he wanted him no matter what, but Timothée was way too important to Armie for him not to do the one thing he asked him for. Time, he just needed some time; Armie knew if he had been the one to ask for it, the brunette would´ve understood, so he did or at least tried to do what Timothée would´ve done.

 

***

 

Armie sighed as the cold water hit his naked body; it was only seven in the morning and he was already up, ready for a series of talk show appearances. His agent had told him he didn´t need to do all of this, and if that conversation had happened a day before Timothée decided he wanted a break, maybe things would´ve gone a different way, maybe he and Timothée could´ve been together, face to face and the brunette wouldn´t feel the way he did.

Those thoughts didn´t make Armie any good though, so he tried to push them away, focus on what he could actually control and that was his job and the time he spent with his kids; since he wouldn´t be seeing Harper and Ford for the week, he chose to dive head first on his work, accepting every single interview, photo shoot and talk show appearance possible.

When he stepped out of the shower, Armie quickly checked on his phone, a habit that had become common for him; still no messages, no phone calls and no voice mails. It had been three weeks, how much more time could Timothée need? Should Armie take that as a hint that what they had was over and the brunette was just too scared to actually say it to his face?

Should he try and move on?

 

****

 

Almost four weeks had gone by and to Armie things were on the borderline of comical. They had been apart almost as much as they had been together and all he had got from Timothée so far was a quick ‘ _Yes, I am okay’_ when he decided to ask if the younger was still alive. Of course Armie knew Timothée had his eyes on him, by that time everyone knew; their likes and retweets were the only lifeline that bounded them together and the media seemed to have finally caught up with that.

It wasn´t a surprise anymore when he saw someone comment of his posts about Timothée´s likes, or even see their names return to gossip sites. To the media, Armie and Timothée were low-key back to the friendship they had shared years prior; Armie couldn´t help but laugh every time he saw something about them, if people only knew what they were going through, if people knew the things they had said and the moments they had shared.

Sometimes Armie wondered if they would ever find out the truth about them, but then he realized that maybe there wasn´t even anything else to be discovered.

“Who would´ve thought you were so good at keeping yourself quiet,” mumbled Armie as he got up from the bed. It was Saturday, he had absolutely nothing to do, Harper and Ford would be there later in the morning, the last thing he wanted was to lie in bed all day thinking about whether he still had a boyfriend or not.

He put on his clothes, made his way to the kitchen, grabbing his bottle of water and got himself ready for yet another run. He needed to clear his head, to focus on something other than his love life; he had very little self-control though, so before he left, he checked his phone and, again there was nothing.

 

****

 

Armie was leaned against a wall, there were dozens of people walking past him as he stood there, shaky hands and phone pressed to his ear; when he heard the _bip_ , a part of him thought of hanging up, but even if Timothée didn´t feel like talking, he did.

“Hey, I know I shouldn´t be calling you, I know you asked for time and I tried my best to do that for you, to support you even if it was killing me; I did that cuz I know you´d do the same for me, but I´m just so desperate from something from you, that I just couldn´t help myself. Sorry if I´m crossing a line here, sorry for the line I will most definitely cross, but I needed you to know, I wanted you to know that I´m here and ready to talk if you need to, cuz I do believe we can figure this out together. Please just…, please just say something, anything; if you think we can still make it work I´ll be thrilled, I´ll be the happiest man in the world, but even if you choose not to go on with our relationship, know that I can be your friend. I´d rather that than not having you in my life again. Please talk to me.”

Armie sighed, he had tried his best to keep himself together; why he chose to do this on an airport was something not even he could comprehend. He looked around, on the panel the announcement of his flight; he grabbed his things and made his way to the gate, the only thing on his head the uncertainty of Timothée´s answer.

 

**_Timothée_ **

****

The music was too loud, the bar was too crowded and Timothée had absolutely no idea of why he was there. For the past month he had resorted to focus his attention on the little work he had; without an actually movie to shoot, Timothée had some time on his hands, which were spent in its entirety thinking about he and Armie.

He knew the older man was going through a tough time, he would always check his messages and posts; Timothée was too struggling with the distance and the radio silence, but he needed that, he needed to be away from Armie to understand if this was all really worth it. It´s one thing to love someone and want to be with that person, to make the relationship work was something completely different.

Timothée didn´t expect to take it so long to make up his mind and he sure as hell thought he would have more self-control than go and like and retweet everything Armie posted on his social media. Timothée hated himself for lurking on the older man, specially cuz he knew all those interactions combined with his lack of response through the phone was giving Armie mixed signals.

If that wasn´t enough, suddenly the media had been watching them intensely and throughout the entire month they were apart, he started getting used to seeing their name on some silly headline that with most certainty allured to the movie they had done together years prior.

“You okay, man?”

Timothée snapped out of his thoughts as he heard one of his friends shout through the music. He looked to his side and nodded his head; he even tried to put on a smile, but that wasn´t going to happen. “I´m good, but I think I´ll head home now”

“You sure?”

“Yes, I had an early morning, I better go get some sleep,” he lied. Timothée had done absolutely nothing the entire day, his thoughts always going back to the same place. To the same person.

He quickly said his goodbyes and made his way out of the bar. There were a few paparazzi’s there, as usual, but luckily enough he didn´t seem like the kind of guy who gave them many juicy stories, so he never really had much trouble with it. At least not in New York.

The streets were crowded as usual, but Timothée barely gave it any attention; with his head down and his hands stuck in his pockets, he walked quiet and unbothered the six blocks from the bar to his building. Once there, he leaned against the brick wall, reached for a cigarette and lighted up; he had barely smoked the years he spent away from Armie and yet right after they were reunited, Timothée would always have a least one with him. In a twisted way, it reminded him on the blonde.

The sheer thought of Armie made his head spin. _Make up your mind_ said a voice inside of him; he had heard that voice many times the last month and every time he told himself that soon he would have an answer.

It was time to admit his mind had been made all along.

He entered the building and picked up his phone, his fingers clicking on the voice mail icon before he could do anything else. Timothée was in the middle of the first flight of stairs when Armie´s voice filled his ears; the man sounded sad, broken and desperate. His heart was suddenly pounding on his chest, his lips tightly pressed together; he had never heard Armie talk like that, he had never sounded so disarmed and vulnerable.

“…please just say something, anything; if you think we can still make it work I´ll be thrilled, I´ll be the happiest man in the world, but even if you choose not to go on with our relationship, know that I can be your friend. I´d rather that than not having you in my life again. Please talk to me.”

Timothée could barely breath by the end of the message, his head was spinning and he almost had to stop in the middle of the stairs to regain his composure. His fingers slid across the telephone screen and hit Armie´s name; he waited a few seconds, his eyes widening as he heard a ringing on the corridor that matched the one in his ear. He reached the last step and looked up, his green eyes watching as a man –at the end of the corridor, by his door- stood up.

“Armie?”

 

**Author's Note:**

> A little sad Armie never hurt nobody.  
> Don´t forget to kudo and/or comment if you liked.  
> follow me on tumblr if you want!


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